Tampons, Pads, Wings, Oh My! A Personal Horror Story

Hello All PEs Winter here!
Ack, sorry I'm a day late... I'm on my period, I'm stick, I have school, things happen! Sowwy.
So, picture this,
I'm home, it's five o'clock, tralalalala, nothing to do here! Then, I feel that familiar wetness.
I dash to the bathroom, and to my despair, we are out of pads. So, I of course, have a really heavy flow, and, I've never used a tampon. However, it's the only thing we have. Sooooooo, guess what!? Yup, I put it in wrong. Blood, blood, blooooood! Oh the Horror! Good thing I noticed before it got everywhere. I went straight to the bathroom, cleaned up, BUT, if you think this is the end, oh no! You are quite mistaken! My dad was going to the store, so, I asked him to pickup pads (my mom was sick, or she sooo would have done it), and, you guessed it, he got the ones without wings. Fun night, right? On top of all that, my cousins were coming in a few days! Whoot whoot. The package clearly says,

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A Quick Update

Hey guys! As you may have noticed, we haven't posted much of anything in a while. We're really sorry about that. I think we may have mentioned this somewhere; all of us writers are Nanowrimo participants, so we took a break for that and never really got ourselves back together. Again, we apologize for that. The good news is, we're going to start back up again! We hope to get the blog up and running again as soon as possible, but before we do that, we'd like to hear from you guys, our readers. What did you like or dislike about the way the blog was going before? Do you have any suggestions or topics that you'd like us to post about? Any regular features we ought to have? If you've got any feedback, please leave us a comment. Don't be afraid to be honest if there's something you dislike; we want your opinion. I promise we won't bite :). And with any luck, we'll be able get the blog running again in a few weeks.

-Julia

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A Personal Period Story - But Not Necessarily A Horror Story

Yesterday was the day of killer cramps for me. I was okay until about midday, when the cramps hit me hard while I was trying to clean my room. At first I was okay with walking around holding a heatbag to my stomach, but just after my mum left to do some errands they became unbearable.
I laid down on my bed and rolled around a bit painfully while my cats watched me with confusion. I started chanting tongue-twisters to take my mind off the cramps. When they failed, I started on poems from Doctor Who, and once I'd used them up I started yelling Linkin Park songs at the top of my lungs. ("I-TRIED-SO-HARD-AND-GOT-SO-FAR-BUT-IN-THE-END - !") Soon, I ran out of songs that I could remember the lyrics to. My mum came home to find me in tears, halfheartedly muttering, "I bleed it out, digging deeper just to throw it ... away ..." (So fitting.)
She sat down and made jokes about my kitten and tried to encourage me to get up and do some exercise, as that always helps me, but I was certain it wouldn't help now. Dead certain. I clung to my heatbag while she added that exercise had helped me every single time I'd ever cramped. My dad came home and tried to convince me to get up and move around. I ignored him, too.
Finally, I decided I couldn't take it anymore. I made my mum promise that getting out and moving would help, and I crawled out of bed.
After a minute of discussion, my parents decided to drive me up the mountain near our house to see the sunset from the lookout. My dad pulled up Youtube music on his phone, music that we could all sing along and jam too. We jammed, even me, and I ignored the cramps as best I good.
We got to the top just as the sun was setting. My mum ran me to the edge of the lookout and we watched the last wisps of sun set. We waved at the people belong, knowing that they couldn't see us. Then we decided it was too cold to stand outside any longer and ran back to the car.
On the way back down, my dad picked out all the fun dubstep songs on his phone, and mum held back all her hatred for those songs (not a dubstep fan, let me tell you) until we got to the bottom of the mountain, where she made us turn them off.
But that was okay, cause them she bought everyone ice cream. I ate my ice cream slowly; I felt very tired. The cramps were just about gone, though they still lingered annoyingly.
As soon as we got home, my mum gave me this official prescription: "Go curl up in bed and watch Sherlock. Doctor's orders."
So I put the last of my ice cream in the fridge, curled up, grabbed my computer and turned on Sherlock. Soon, the feels were too much - the cramps just had to go. After one episode I was feeling well enough to watch Gilmore Girls with the family during dinner. The cramps hung around in the background like they wished to come back but they didn't.
After dinner, I curled up with my cat for a little while and that was it for the cramps. No! they yelled. You're too happy! You need to be crying and thinking about us! And then they were whisked away by the sound of my cat purring. I felt fine the rest of the evening and I'm doing just as well today.

I knew I had awesome parents before this, but now, well, I don't know what to say. Thanks Mama and Papa :)
And so that this post isn't just a really long cramps story, next time you're cramping, try getting out of the house. Even if you feel like you could never ever do that. And if that doesn't work or you can't bring yourself to do it, Sherlock/Doctor Who/[Insert Fandom Show Here] will probably help.

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What can go wrong with your period

Periods generally work the same way. However, lots of things can go wrong with your period. Here's a few of them, as well as some common symptoms and cures.

• Heavy Flow; your period is consistently very heavy and you go through a lot of menstrual products (e. g. pads, tampons) per day.

• You could have a tumor in your uterus. These tumors become more common as you age.
• To get rid of a tumor, you'd probably have to get surgery.
• Tumors in your uterus also tend to shrink or disappear after menopause, because there's not as much estrogen to feed them. However, waiting until menopause could be a long time.
• You could also have a blood clotting problem.
• You should probably see a doctor for this.

• Light/Non-existent flow; your flow is very light or non-existent.

• Your period could still be regulating itself. Your menstrual cycle generally acts a bit wonky for the year after your period begins.
• No cure for this, just got to wait it out.
• Your hymen or uterus could be malformed.
• Talk to a doctor about corrective surgery.
• You could be pregnant.
• Take a pregnancy test to check for pregnancy. If you are pregnant, there's nothing to be done for your menstrual cycle except have the baby.
• If you're taking birth control pills, they could be messing up your flow.
• Try not taking any birth control pills for a while and see if your period goes back to normal. If they do, you should probably stay off birth control pills. There are better methods of preventing pregnancy, anyway.

• Cramps; you're having really bad cramps.
• Cramps are a normal part of periods, and most people who experience periods get at least mild cramps.
• Try taking some ibuprofen or aspirin for mild cramps. Heatbags and chocolate can also be effective.
• If you're having really, really bad cramps that keep you from moving and such, you might have endometrosis, which means that tissue grows outside of your uterus during the menstrual cycle. When you have your flow, this tissue has nowhere to go, and it causes inflammation which can produce horrible cramps.
• You might need hormonal treatments or surgery to fix endometrosis. Talk to your doctor for help.

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Menstruation On The TARDIS

Came across this online, thought I'd share:

In my opinion, with the number of female companions there have been, he probably knows all about menstruation. I think Nine would have been like, "Ah, yes, I'll drop you off right away." Ten would have been very serious and grim, but handled it alright. Eleven would be the "YOU BLEED WHERE?" and Twelve would snap, "You don't have to say it so loudly."
Post your opinion in the comments. 

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Periods and your teacher. (Also, grade 7 boys- personal horror story included)

You've tried to avoid it.  We all have.  But sometimes, there comes a moment when talking to your teacher about your period is necessary.  For me, it was necessary in Gifted class in grade 7.  We were working a project where we had to build a stable bridge out of tape, straws, and popsicle sticks.  I was assigned a group with two boys.  While the teacher was handing out the instructions, besides having to use the restroom anyway, I was feeling a little wet.  That's when I remembered that my period was going to be coming soon- and guess who wasn't prepared?!  (Seriously, you'd think I'd learn my lesson at some point, but I still get caught unprepared more than I'd like).  Anyway, as soon as the directions were passed out I asked her if I could go to the bathroom, trying to angle my butt away from people's view as much as possible.  She told me to wait until she finished explaining.  Since I was lucky enough to have a female teacher, I lowered my voice and said, "I really need to go, please.  It's a girl emergency." She told me that I couldn't go at that second, but she did say for me to just leave as soon as she stopped talking and not bother coming back up. 

I left while still trying to hide my butt, doing this weird sideways walk, and when I got to the bathroom I saw a huge bloodstain.  And I had drama practice until 5pm!  That was 4 hours away!

As embarrassing as it was, I learned a few helpful things about talking to your teacher about your period.

1. Be polite.  Don't get mad at your teacher for not letting you leave, or they might not let you go at all.

2. Know your teacher.  If they have (or had) periods, too, then you can be more discreet about how you say it than if your teacher is biologically male.  In which case, it's probably better to be more blunt.  (But not overly descriptive- be reasonable.  What do they really need to know?  Tell them that and nothing more.)

3. Don't be too shy to say something.  Your problem will only get worse, I promise.

4. Don't speak loudly enough for classmates to hear.  This goes without saying- they don't need to know what's going on.

5. I had a pad I could use, but if your teacher has periods, and if you don't have anything to use, don't be afraid to ask them.  (Or if not, ask for a quarter to get one from the restroom and pay them back later).  This goes with number 3- while hard to do, it will help more than hurt and teachers usually understand, even if you don't think they like you.

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When Facing A Thousand Products

Have you ever walked down the "Feminine Hygiene" section of the grocery store? There are loads of different products to choose from - pads, pantiliners, tampons, moon cups, soft cups, Diva cups, (all of those are separate things) even disposable underwear. On top of that, there are thirty different variations of each one. How the heck can you choose?

I can't speak for all products. I've only ever tried pads and soft cups. However, I'll do my best to give some general help for choosing. We'll probably go into specifics with  each product in the future.

Here are some general tips:

1. Consider what is most comfortable for you. Does the idea of sticking something inside you freak you out? Don't try tampons or any cups.  Does the idea of sitting in your own blood sound disgusting? Maybe you'd be better off with a moon cup instead of pads or disposable underwear.

2. Consider your daily life. Do you spend a lot of time swimming or exercising? Try a tampon. Is your home life more relaxed? Perhaps you want to try pads.

3. Consider budget. Moon cups can be extremely expensive, especially compared to soft cups and pads.

 

That's my three general tips for the day - on to some specifics. Here's some things to think about when you're standing in front of a shelf of menstrual products.

 

How heavy is my flow? Most products will say right on the front what kind of flow they are for. If you have a heavy flow, look for pads that say "Extra Absorbent" or "Extra Heavy." I've tried one of these before - they get so big that it literally feels like you stuffed a pillow in your panties. Tampons will often say "Ultra Absorbency" or some variation of that. Menstrual cups of all kind are good for heavy flows.

But what if you have a super light flow? They make products for that, too. "Ultra Thin" pads are designed for people with lighter flows. If your flow is particularly light, however, please avoid tampons. They are meant to absorb and dry out the inside of your vagina, which can cause some nasty problems down there. They do make tampons for super light flows, so if you must use one, look for that's made specifically for light flows. Menstrual cups, again, of all kinds, do not absorb, so they'll be fine.

What is my size? Size plays a huge role in choosing products. Tampons come in many different sizes; a larger one may work well for one person, but it could be too big for another. If you're smaller, try "Junior Slim" or "Slim." If you're larger, try "Extra Absorbency" or something similar.

What quality to I prefer? Nearly all products will work, but some are nicer than others. If you don't really care then cheapest will be fine. If you prefer nicer you'll have to pay a little bit more. (Kotex makes really nice pads for teens. I adore them.) If you're looking for something reusable, you'll probably want some quality in there, as they'll be used over and over again.

 

Next, I have the DOs and DON'Ts of product choosing.

 

DO….

 

….buy tampons with applicators. I've honestly never used a tampon, so I don't have any authority to say this, but it seems like it'd be a little more "ew" without the applicator.

….try to buy more natural products, such as menstrual sponges or pads made from cotton. They're all around better for you. (A friend recommends Seventh Generation pantiliners.)

….try out different products. Maybe you'll like Diva cups better than tampons.

….try out different types of products. You might find that you prefer a slimmer tampon over the one you have.

….try out different brands of products. Some brands are just better than others.

….be picky. If you don't like a product, don't use it.

 

DON'T….

 

….buy scented pads. They have chemicals that can irritate your vagina.

….buy something just because it has a pretty box. (It's surprising how tempting this can be.)

….buy a pad just because it says "unnoticeable" or "invisible" unless you have a light flow. This means it's thinner, which means its less absorbent.

….confuse pantiliners for pads.

….buy super absorbent tampons if you have a light flow. I mentioned this above but it's rather important: lighter flow needs a lighter tampon, because tampons will dry out your vaginal tissues.

….buy wingless pads. They have a tendency to slide and make you leak.

 

That's all the advice on products I have for you today. Hopefully, this makes choosing from a thousand different menstrual products a little bit easier. What are some of your favorite products or brands? Think I'm missing something in this post? Tell us in the comments!

Special thanks to Azy Vurrkyn (a.k.a. LA-LA) for adding to the DOs and DON'Ts list.

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Dad, I'm On The Red River: Fathers and Menstruation

 As all of us probably know, it's awkward, uncomfortable, and downright scary to talk to your father about periods. However, your dad loves you and wants to help you. He'll probably be happy to help if you need it.

That still doesn't eliminate the awkward-uncomfortable-scary part. Today, I had a tense conversation with my father so that I could write a post on this. And guess what? It wasn't that bad.

To start, your dad loves you. He wants to help his not-so-little child in any way he can. While he probably finds the topic of menstruation awkward, he'll also probably be okay if you wanted to discuss it. When I first asked my dad to have a chat with me about periods, he was a little put-off at first, but soon into the conversation we both relaxed. I asked him some questions, which he happily answered (thank you, Papa!), and supplied most of the content of this post.

So, why is this such a horrible topic? What makes talking to your dad about it so embarrassing? Well, think about this. When our fathers were growing up, things like menstruation, sex, pregnancy - all those things were taboo. Menstruation was a woman thing. It was intimate and private. Talking about it was a BIG no-no. In this day and age we're slowly becoming more open and recognizing it as a human thing instead of a female thing, but it still carries over into our dads, who grew up looking at it as something you didn't talk about.

Another thing to think about is the fact that menstruation means physical maturity. It's a sign that Dad's baby is growing up into a person. He's both sad and proud. It also means that you can officially get pregnant. On top of normal worries, your dad now has to worry about that.

What if you're alone with your dad and you're out of tampons or pads? How should you tell your dad about this? Essentially, your father wants you to be comfortable talking to him about anything. Of course, this is rarely the case or else I wouldn't be writing this post.

Here's a personal story. I got my period for the first time in a library at evening. I didn't know that's what it was; I felt a little wet and thought it was just vaginal fluid. I went home and found that my mother had gone out someplace. I then went to the bathroom to find that there was this HUGE, shiny stain in my panties. I freaked out. It was just me and my dad home - what could I do? The obvious choice was to tell my dad that I'd gotten my period so that he could help me. I looked at that choice and said NOPE NOT HAPPENING IN A THOUSAND YEARS. I mean, what would I say to him? I wiped up as best I could with toilet paper and went to bed that night with nothing on at all, feeling wet all night long. Why? Because I was too scared to ask my dad for help.

A few years later, I now know that my dad would have been happy to help me. And I know that yours will too. So, back to the question: What if you need to ask your dad for help? My dad answered the question with this: Be frank. Don't beat around the bush, don't use a bunch of period slang, just tell him outright: "I'm on my period and I need tampons." (I've actually heard of someone telling their dad: "I'm on the Red River and I need more floaties.") Be blunt and tell him exactly what you need.

But wait, what if it's someone else's dad? Awkward! But the same rules apply. If he has a child who has gotten their period, or even just a wife, he'll probably understand. Be polite and state precisely what it is you need from him, else you risk him not understanding your slang, which will make things all the more awkward.

In all situations, your best bet is to be absolutely frank. Leaking? Tell your dad outright and he'll probably do his best to help you clean up, or he'll find a trustworthy woman to help. Leaking and with someone else's dad? He might be able to find a change of clothes from his own child or find his wife to help you.

Finally, my father says to other fathers to be as open as you can. The same applies to us PEs. If you're open with your father this will help strengthen your relationship with him and make situations involving periods a little less uncomfortable.

 

Do you have any dad-related period stories? Share them in the comments!

Many thanks to my beloved Papa for enduring awkward questions and being a great dad.

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Periods and Sickness

First of all, I'd like to say for the record how fitting this post is.  When I was actually supposed to write this, I had the flu, and once I got better, I got crushed under homework mountain.  I wasn't on my period, but I just wanted to point out the irony.
Being sick and on your period is miserable.  Along with the normal crummy period symptoms, you also have to deal with whatever super-fun symptoms that come with whatever sickness you've managed to contract.  But there's ways to make it slightly better.
1. Pain relievers.  I know I mention these a lot and I'm not saying they're always the best or the only way to go, but in addition to relieving cramps and aches they also often bring down fevers, which can make you feel semi-normal.
2. Use being sick to your advantage.  What better excuse to not get out of bed?  As awful as it feels, there's some advantage to being sick while on your period in that no one actually expects you to do anything, unlike when you have your period while you're well.  So rest!  Stay in bed and refuse to come out, if you want.
3. Drink a lot of water.  This is a good idea anyway, but water can ease cramps, and it helps you from being dehydrated while sick, especially if you have a fever.

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Talking to younger sisters about your period

Hey guys! Today I'm going to talk about telling younger sisters about your period. I've got 5 younger sisters, ages 11 to 2 weeks, so I get a lot of awkward questions, as well as lots of different levels of understanding. When I'm on my flow, the 11 year old asks a bunch of questions because it's going to happen to her soon, the 8 year old doesn't care what's happening, the 6 year old doesn't care at all, the 2 year old offers me her diapers (which is nice of her), and the baby doesn't do anything. So let's discuss a few possible scenarios and how best to deal with them. 

1. You've got a sister who will probably be getting her period soon, and she wants to know how something works. In this case, sit her down and be honest with her, but don't freak her out more than necessary. For example, say something along the lines of "Your period is when your body clears out a protective lining" as opposed to "Your body is scraping out its own flesh and dumping it out of you." Your sister is not a baby, but there's no need to terrify her. If she's not sure what to ask but wants to know how her period works, I have a post on that. Basically walk her through something like that; explain why it happens and what to expect. 

2. A slightly younger sister who doesn't know what a period is finds your  discarded bloody pads in the trash can and wants to know what it is what's going on. With a younger sibling, it's probably better to call in your mom if possible, but you can tell them that when girls get older, their bodies start to change and they'll bleed sometimes. Assure them that there's nothing wrong with you and that they won't have to worry about it any time soon. Again, don't freak them out. If a little kid keeps asking questions, it would be good if you could call your mom for reinforcements. 

3. A really young sibling sees a bloodstain and gets worried that you're hurt or something. Just tell them you're okay and move on. If a  little kid asks stuff, this is the best approach. 

4. If a brother or asks something (I'm including one thing on brothers even though this post is mainly about sisters), there are a couple possible approaches. If he's little, see steps 3 and 3. If he's a little older, say around 10, you could try to shoo him away and tell him it's girl stuff. If you want to answer his questions for whatever reason or he keeps asking, give him the very basics but let him know that this is private and tell him not to go laugh with his friends about it later. If he's any older, he should know what a period is and will probably leave you alone.  

I hope this helps!

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