As all of us
probably know, it's awkward, uncomfortable, and downright scary to talk to your father about periods.
However, your dad loves you and wants to help you. He'll probably be happy to
help if you need it.
That still doesn't
eliminate the awkward-uncomfortable-scary part. Today, I had a tense
conversation with my father so that I could write a post on this. And guess
what? It wasn't that bad.
To start, your dad loves you. He wants to help his
not-so-little child in any way he can. While he probably finds the topic of
menstruation awkward, he'll also probably be okay if you wanted to discuss it.
When I first asked my dad to have a chat with me about periods, he was a little
put-off at first, but soon into the conversation we both relaxed. I asked him
some questions, which he happily answered (thank you, Papa!), and supplied
most of the content of this post.
So, why is this such a horrible topic? What makes
talking to your dad about it so embarrassing? Well, think about this. When our
fathers were growing up, things like menstruation, sex, pregnancy - all those
things were taboo. Menstruation was a woman thing.
It was intimate and private. Talking about it was a BIG no-no. In this day and
age we're slowly becoming more open and recognizing it as a human thing instead
of a female thing, but it still carries over into our dads, who grew up looking
at it as something you didn't talk about.
Another thing to
think about is the fact that menstruation means physical maturity. It's a sign
that Dad's baby is growing up into a person. He's both sad and proud. It also
means that you can officially get pregnant. On top of normal worries, your dad
now has to worry about that.
What if you're alone
with your dad and you're out of tampons or pads? How should you tell your dad
about this? Essentially, your father wants you to be comfortable talking to him
about anything. Of course, this is rarely the case or else I wouldn't be writing
this post.
Here's a personal
story. I got my period for the first time in a library at evening. I didn't
know that's what it was; I felt a little wet and thought it was just vaginal
fluid. I went home and found that my mother had gone out someplace. I then went
to the bathroom to find that there was this HUGE, shiny stain in my panties. I
freaked out. It was just me and my dad home - what could I do? The obvious
choice was to tell my dad that I'd gotten my period so that he could help me. I
looked at that choice and said NOPE NOT
HAPPENING IN A THOUSAND YEARS. I mean, what would I say to him? I wiped
up as best I could with toilet paper and went to bed that night with nothing on
at all, feeling wet all night long. Why? Because I was too scared to ask my dad
for help.
A few years later, I
now know that my dad would have been happy to help me. And I know that yours
will too. So, back to the question: What if you need to ask your dad for help?
My dad answered the question with this: Be
frank. Don't beat around the bush, don't use a bunch of period slang, just tell him outright:
"I'm on my period and I need tampons." (I've actually heard of
someone telling their dad: "I'm on the Red River and I need more
floaties.") Be blunt and tell him exactly what you need.
But wait, what if
it's someone else's dad? Awkward! But
the same rules apply. If he has a child who has gotten their period, or even
just a wife, he'll probably understand. Be polite and state precisely what it
is you need from him, else you risk him not understanding your slang, which
will make things all the more awkward.
In all situations,
your best bet is to be absolutely frank. Leaking? Tell your dad outright and
he'll probably do his best to help you clean up, or he'll find a trustworthy
woman to help. Leaking and with someone else's dad? He might be able to find a
change of clothes from his own child or find his wife to help you.
Finally, my father
says to other fathers to be as open as you can. The same applies to us PEs. If
you're open with your father this will help strengthen your relationship with
him and make situations involving periods a little less uncomfortable.
Do you have any dad-related period stories? Share them in the comments!
Many thanks to my beloved Papa for enduring awkward
questions and being a great dad.